the average goddess,
the compulsive shopaholic,
the absentminded ditz,
and just a little insane.
; drama mama; councillor;
1. participate more actively in CYF/Mustard Seed.
2. participate more in CCAs.
3. be a better older sister.
4. be a better daughter for once.
5. get good grades and maintain them.
, not talk. (this applies to class too!)
7. have a journal/diary.
8. be a friend to everyone.
9. remember important dates.
10. stay happy, even when the tears fall. :)
Friday, February 18, 2005
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i've spent the last hour crying between intervals.
to know that you're hurting, hurt me enough.
to know that you're hurting and i can't do anything, is much worse.
but to know that you're hurting, and i'm the reason for your hurt...
i never knew i was capable of hurting someone so much.
i never knew i had this capacity for cruelty.
i never knew that i could feel this way about myself.
i'm not good enough for you, or really, not good enough for anyone.
you don't deserve someone like me.
you deserve someone who's kinder. sweeter. lovelier. more caring.
i wish i could lie to myself, but i've not been that to you at all. you know that's true.
I have dreamed of a time when I'd leave this all behind,
But I thought that I'd be stronger or I hoped that I'd be blind.
But now I know that I am neither and it hurts to say goodbye.
I will always have your skyline in my eyes...
and you. i don't know what to say about you.
at 5:57 PM