#vanessa;
the average goddess,

the compulsive shopaholic,

the absentminded ditz,

and just a little insane.

240788-->leo;
ex-IJTP.4/nine2004;
cjc.1T05;
swimmer; drama mama; councillor;
laugh_out_loud247[at]hotmail[dot]com;

# resolutions;
1. participate more actively in CYF/Mustard Seed.
2. participate more in CCAs.
3. be a better older sister.
4. be a better daughter for once.
5. get good grades and maintain them.
6. listen, not talk. (this applies to class too!)
7. have a journal/diary.
8. be a friend to everyone.
9. remember important dates.
10. stay happy, even when the tears fall. :)

# linkage;
pinkstilettos;
temporary insanity;
guestbook;
poetry;


angels`
-friends

4/nine.
chij.
alyssa.
angie.
benjamin.
bernie.
bert.
brendan.
carol.
carol n.
charles.
cheryl.
chris.
corinne.
dalun.
darren.
elsa.
erika.
gen.
joachim.
jolene.
judette.
kimberly.
lester.
nat.
qibing.
roxy.
sam.
sean.
seb.
sheryl.
stephi.

-snaps
[Carolling]
[Dinner&Dance]
[CJC]
[Chinese New Year]
[Poetry]
[Misc]
[Sentosa]
[Thanksgiving Mass]
[The Rockafellaskank]
[CYF Camp]
[T8 Orientation]
[31st March]
[Elects Camp]
[Discover! Camp]

-thanks
blogger;cursor;angelfire; photobucket;music;

-memories
July 2003; August 2003; September 2003; October 2003; November 2003; December 2003; January 2004; February 2004; March 2004; April 2004; May 2004; June 2004; July 2004; August 2004; October 2004; November 2004; December 2004; January 2005; February 2005; March 2005; May 2005; June 2005;

layoutandimages[by]q|en

Saturday, March 06, 2004
i feel lost. just read christine's blog. yeahh. maybe i am screwing my life up. maybe i am being hypocritical. maybe i'm not trying hard enough. maybe for once in my life, i'm trying to find a meaning. maybe i'm just tired of trying. maybe i want god to be there. maybe i just want to be left alone. maybe i don't ever want that to happen. maybe i'm scared of losing my friends. maybe i'm just scared. maybe i want to make my friends happy. maybe i just don't know how to do that. maybe i want people to believe in me. maybe i should do something about that first. maybe i'm being stupid. maybe i am stupid. maybe i want to go back to the past. maybe i should realise there's no way that's going to happen. maybe i should wake up. maybe i should pray this is all a long nightmare. maybe there's someone. maybe there isn't. maybe i wish i wasn't quite so idiotic and blur. maybe i want to change... but do you know that? maybe i wish i could answer your questions. maybe i wish you'd never asked. maybe i am fucked. maybe i wish i knew how to change.

maybe i'm trying. but i don't know how.

she smiled
at 9:06 PM


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